Joe: Good afternoon. This's Joe.

LPC: Oh, hi. This is Jim, Colin. How are you doing?

Joe: Good.

LPC: Hey, good.

LPC: So, yeah, Joe, I got a bunch of pot metal from Alcapulco,

LPC: and I'm trying to forge a bunch of bakeware here in my foundry,

LPC: and I'm thinking of getting into an alloy of some kind instead.

LPC: Do you guys maybe have any pig iron available that I could purchase?

Joe: —I really don’t have—yeah, I really don’t have anything like that—

Joe: Everything we carry is pretty much structural.

Joe: —so all the shapes and the sheets and the plates and angles and channels and flat bar and that kinda stuff.

LPC: Well, yeah, that's what I mean.

LPC: I'd like to gild the fulcrum.

LPC: So maybe could I add some nickel to it?

LPC: Something along those lines?

Joe: —Uh, y—yeah, I guess you could—

LPC: I'm tempering my scrubs.

LPC: Oh, that's okay. That's okay. That's okay. I'm tempering my scrap currently, and I typically

LPC: galvanized my pipe in my furnace, but I'm ending up with molten leakage, every damn wire. So I'm

LPC: looking to harden my converter. What do you have any of your reserves up there? As far as what?

LPC: Well, I just came down from the cluster mill; that’s who gave me your phone number.

LPC: And they were saying that they think,

LPC: I thought I was just needing to refine my slag.

LPC: —do you think I should puddle my scrap or…? I’m kind of at a loss here, so… [sfx]—

Joe: I, yeah, and we're, when I say, I'm not familiar with most of the terms you're using.

Joe: Oh.

Joe: Okay.

Joe: We're just, we're a service center.

Joe: We sell raw steel products.

Joe: Shapes, like steel shapes, you know.

Joe: know that fabricate angle frames and square tubing and round tube and that kind of stuff.

Joe: That's what we do. We sell those kind of products.

LPC: Well, that sounds good. I don't have access myself to a Sinsmer mill.

LPC: So I've been getting by with shot blasting or pickling, usually. So could I use a stiffener,

LPC: or would it be too bulbous? Obviously, I don't want any buckling. Sorry. Yeah, I don't.

Joe: Yeah, I don't know your application.

Joe: Randy.

LPC: —Okay! Well that’s alright. Um—

LPC: Yeah.

LPC: I was in the middle of bushelming.

LPC: No, it's okay.

LPC: I was just one other question, if I may.

LPC: I was in the middle of busheling my clippings when my fern has started hot idling,

LPC: and now the whole thing is just mothballing.

LPC: Do you think you guys could maybe help me if I wanted to try scarfing the whole thing?

Joe: I wouldn't be able to help.

Joe: you with any of that, no.

LPC: Oh, my dad here thinks that he could phrase it better.

LPC: Would you talk to him?

LPC: My dad, Joe, here?

Joe: Okay.

LPC: Just here, let him know you talk to me.

LPC: I'm Jim. Hold on a sec.

Joe: Okay.

LPC: Joe pick up.

Sour Joe: Hello.

Joe: Hello.

Sour Joe: Yes.

Joe: Yes, sir.

Sour Joe: Who’s this?

Joe: This is Joe.

Sour Joe: Talk to you.

Sour Joe: You're going to be in jail, mother sick of shit.

LPC: Hey! So did we get that worked out or…?

Joe: I have no idea, man.

Joe: Yeah.

LPC: Okay, so maybe if I took all my lump ore, could we try slitting the width on that?

LPC: Or would that hamper the ductility at the fulcrum?

Joe: I am sorry, sir.

Joe: I have no idea what you're even talking about.

LPC: I'm at a loss here, big guy.

Joe: Yeah, I can't help you.

LPC: That's fine.

LPC: Thank you now.

LPC: Okay.

Joe: This’s Joe.

LPC: Hey, Joe, it's Jimbo.

LPC: I talked to you earlier in the week.

LPC: How are you doing?

Joe: Pretty good.

LPC: Hey, good.

LPC: Hey, I think I've hit upon a solution with all the crockery I'm forging here.

LPC: Like when I make a perfideral or a pudding or something, the bottom will always burn, you know?

LPC: But I think if I had scalp to my bakeware, it would be perfect.

LPC: Then I could make jelly or meringue.

LPC: So maybe if I butt well the scalp, what do you think on?

LPC: something like that.

Joe: I have no idea what you’re talkin’ about, man!

LPC: Well, I'm ready to get casting with you.

LPC: I'm ready to pour here.

Joe: —Yeah, I don’t know what you’re talking about in any way, shape, or form!

LPC: Well I’m trying to cook—

Joe: I don't have anything going with you.

LPC: I'm a cook, okay, and I'm trying to get the right kind of crockery for all my food.

LPC: I'd like to put down a deposit, maybe on some electrolytic tin plating or something.

LPC: I think that would brighten my tubing.

LPC: Oh, hey.

LPC: That reminds me.

LPC: Do you guys ever go exotic, like, fabricate zirconium or something,

LPC: or do a half-neum extrusion or anything like that?

Joe: No.

LPC: Because I've got to have 48 canolae cooked by this weekend,

LPC: and this Alcapulco pot metal is just not cutting it, a friend.

Joe: Yeah.

Joe: Yeah, unfortunately, I'm not going to be able to help you out, buddy.

LPC: Well could I buy some nickel from ye? Just—

Joe: —I don’t have nickel!

LPC: I'm getting scint her and all my crusts here, and they crack,

LPC: and I can't be cracking crusts up here.

Joe: I might have some welding rod out there, if you wanna come down ’n take a look at it.

LPC: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Joe: Not all I would have for nickel.

LPC: Maybe you could talk to my dad.

LPC: He's a metallurgist.

LPC: He could explain it better, you know.

LPC: Let me get him online.

LPC: Talk to Joe.

LPC: His name's Joe also.

LPC: Hey, Joe, talk to Joe.

Sour Joe: Hello?

Sour Joe: Hello.

Joe: Hello.

Sour Joe: Yes.

Joe: How are we doing?

Sour Joe: Yeah.

Sour Joe: Who's speaking?

Joe: My name is Joe.

Sour Joe: Yeah.

Sour Joe: Why are you calling me?

Joe: I have no idea.

Joe: You guys call me.

Sour Joe: Huh?

Joe: I have no idea what you guys need or talking—even talkin' about.

Sour Joe: Why don't you lay off, huh?

Sour Joe: Why don't you lay it?

Sour Joe: Because I'm going to beg God that you should drop death if you're interrogating me.

Joe: Uh.

Sour Joe: Don't you?

Sour Joe: Don't you believe in God?

Sour Joe: Why you keep on bothering me?

Sour Joe: You know, a piece of shit, shit, shit.