Jona: Fire department. Good afternoon.

LPC: My name's ping pong. I'm new to the area. I just moved down here from Castle Rock.

LPC: And I got your number from the mailman.

LPC: Okay.

LPC: So yeah, I'm just going to be taking some pictures and some video and stuff.

LPC: Is there any chance you'd let me borrow your fire truck?

LPC: We're just making a video and we've got worms and snakes. It's going to be wild.

LPC: Real wild.

Jona: Who are you calling?

LPC: For Jona!

Jona: Jona Olsson, Chief of the Fire Department?

LPC: Yes, uh-huh.

LPC: I live in the same area as you.

LPC: We've got the same mailman up here.

Jona: Okay.

Jona: Where are you living, Panama?

LPC: I just moved down from Colorado! So [laughs]—

LPC: So I don't know anybody else in the area up here.

Jona: Where are you living here?

LPC: I live in New Mexico.

LPC: Now, I'm brand new, and we're making a video.

LPC: I'll credit you it's you.

LPC: However you want on YouTube.

Jona: Hang on.

Jona: Where are you living in New Mexico?

LPC: Well, I don't know the area too.

LPC: well, but we have the same mail.

LPC: Man, he gave me your number.

LPC: I can give you three, four dollars, you know, a day.

Jona: Okay.

Jona: No, thank you.

LPC: What's it going to take?

Jona: Good afternoon.

Jona: This is Jonah.

LPC: Hey, Jonah, it's ping pong.

LPC: Can we please work something out here for just a few hours of your time?

Jona: I can't.

Jona: A, what are the sirens I keep hearing?

LPC: Well, I'm outside.

LPC: I was going to your house to knock on the door, but no one answers her.

Jona: There’s no sirens going by up here!

LPC: So, can we please work this out on your fire truck up?

LPC: I can give you $5, six dollars, you know, an hour.

LPC: —It’s just for the video!—

Jona: —There’s no Department vehicle that I can loan to anyone, so please stop calling me. Thank you!

LPC: Can I borrow your car for the video shoot. Just for—

Jona: Good afternoon.

Jona: This is Jonah.

LPC: Hi, Jonah.

LPC: I did want to just let you know that I'm going to be there in a few minutes just to get into the fire truck, okay?

LPC: For the photographs?

Jona: Would you stop calling?

Jona: I don't know what?

Jona: kind of scam you're doing, but stop calling this number.

LPC: It’ll only be about 20 minutes!

Jona: This is Jona.

LPC: Jonah, hi, I only need 20 minutes of your time.

LPC: Okay, today?

Jona: You’re not getting any of my time. I have no idea who you are and what kinda scam you are running—

LPC: —I told you I’d credit you, however you want, on YouTube, for the video!

Jona: I don’t give a shit about that!— —Stop calling us!

Jona: Listen, I'll meet you in 10 minutes.

Jona: Our fire department will not participate.

LPC: I'll meet you in 10 minutes. It'll be great. Okay. You're going to love it.

Jona: Anyway.

Jona: Goodbye.

LPC: Lemme get a photograph with you, okay?

Jona: This is Jona.

LPC: Hi, Jona. This is Pingpong.—

LPC: —What appears to be the trouble up here?!

Jona: Good afternoon.

Jona: This is Jonah.

LPC: Hi.

LPC: I just wanted to let you know.

LPC: We were there over the weekend.

LPC: We were with the trucks.

LPC: And we're all done and we were all taken care of, okay?

Jona: Okay, then stop calling this number.

Jona: Don't?

Jona: I'm going to call the cops.

Jona: This is Jona.

LPC: Jonah, just real quick.

LPC: The only thing is we left behind an earthworm.

LPC: Have you guys seen that at all?

LPC: Our cameraman.

Jona: Would you shut the fuck up?

Jona: Who are you?

LPC: This is ping pong.

Jona: At ping pong.

Jona: I don't believe that for a second.

Jona: I don't know what kind of scam you're running.

Jona: Can you understand me?

Jona: You seem to understand English.

Jona: Do not call me again ever.

LPC: Will you just find the earthworm, please?

Jona: Do you understand me?

LPC: That's all we need.

None: I don't know.